Hope That is Unseen

" 22We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time. 23Not only so, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. 24For in this hope we were saved. But hope that is seen is no hope at all. Who hopes for what he already has? 25But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.

26In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. 27And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will."

Hope That is Unseen

The scriptures above are from Romans 8, a chapter that Pastor Jerry Yates shared with me while I was in the hospital. It became one of my favorite chapters of the Bible - I read it to anyone who is willing to listen. Even though I know the book of Romans is a letter, I still picture Paul speaking the words as though he is reciting one of Shakespeare's Soliloquies. The verses that stood out to me the most were 24 and 25. I felt very convicted because I was worrying constantly, not trusting that God was working in my favor while I was sitting in my hospital bed. So I put those verses up on the board in my room and everytime I felt anxiety I'd look them over and they would bring me some comfort. I'm not going to lie and say I felt instantly at ease, but I did pray that I would have faith in what I could not see, and have trust in God.

Since I have returned home from the hospital I have seen many ways that God had been working in my favor. First, while at a Christmas dinner with my friends Karissa and James and family, James' Mother informed me that after reading the article published about me in the Stockton Record she had become so outraged that she wrote my insurance company an angry letter and also wrote St. Joseph's a letter thanking them for the way they were assisting me with returning home. She told several other people to do the same.

I spent the last couple of days sorting through boxes and boxes of paperwork. I was amazed at all of the cards that people sent me - especially the cards from extended family members or even friends of friends that I don't know too well. I feel so blessed that people took the time to write down some thoughts and send them my way - prayers and best wishes from around the country. It reminded me of another extended hospital stay in which people from all around sent me letters and cards. These last few days have been sort of painful, it's a weird feeling to open these cards. But it's a good hurt. I don't really know how to explain it. But thank you everyone.

Today I was walking into Target to buy some storage for all the paperwork I mentioned above. My mom dropped me off at the front and then went to park the care. As I entered a stranger said "Hey, you got out of the hospital". The young woman explained that her Aunt had been in the hospital recently, and she remembered seeing me. She appeared so pleased to see me out and about - I felt a little celebrity status! lol. I asked how her Aunt was - she had been moved to a care home but is doing better. We wished each other well and went about our shopping.

My Aunt Maxine from Idaho, who I rarely speak to, called me yesterday. She, also, was very pleased that I am home, and she wanted to share something with me. Apparently she had been regularly updating a co-worker about my situation, and had shared my article with her. My Aunt wanted me to know this woman was excited that I was home and had been diligently praying for me and also thought of me as an extraordinary person. I didn't know how to take the information, it was very moving, and compliments are always hard. So I just told her to tell her co-worker "thank you" and joked about the fact that I am writing a book.

These are only a few ways I have seen that God was working in my favor. It is very humbling, because I was far from the brave Christian while in the hospital - and definitely not my first few days home. But I did feel strengthened from those scriptures, and I hope you find something from them as well.

I think in the beginning of my book, where people sometimes put quotes, I will put the chorus to a song I hope to someday sing faithfully.

"Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him
How I've proved Him O'er and O'er
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus
Oh, for grace to trust Him more."

Goodnight, and thanks for reading. God Bless.